Monday, April 18, 2011

The Bridezilla Paradox

I need to provide the disclaimer that I am writing this on a very cranky, cold morning in mid-April when I have had very little sleep.

But people, I am pissed off.

I like the magazine Slate. I generally think it has good things to say and that commenters tend to be reasonable. Which is why discovering this article on wedding websites from last year and the oodles of comments that went with it was particularly dismaying to me.

The article is about how wedding websites are terrible because they are just another example of indulgent, narcissistic brides. A lot of the comments repeat the tired "don't spend a down payment on ONE DAY and get over yourselves, no one cares about this but you." And I was reminded of another article in Slate I read (can't remember the exact one, unfortunately) where people talked about how rude and tacky you were for not paying enough attention to your guests' needs.

Hey guess what, world? Planning and executing a wedding that is an enjoyable day for your guests takes work, focus, and some amount of money. It doesn't have to take $50K or anything, but I am really fed up with the simultaneous messages that a) spending a lot on one day makes brides self-centered crazypeople and that b) if you don't give provide your guests with things that will cost money (i.e. an open bar, a full dinner, etc.) that you are ALSO being self-centered because you were not thinking of your guests. 

What is our DEAL with weddings? No one is this weird about regular parties.

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